me in a trap

it's hardly to believe
someone i trust is changed
i couldnt believe it
but i didnt want to show it to him
i feel doubt in my heart
i cant make any decision
i feel down..but i cant recover my self
if this make me feel bad..i just let the scar spread in my mind
it's stupid
but i try to always open my mind and open my heart
hope that someday everything will be ok

i dont know either will be worse
i should take a step
i dont wanna trap in this kind of feeling
i need to move on in my life
i want to pass succeedly in this way..
i feel really bad..

but i have to move on
i try to ignore him
until i dont mind if someday he will leave me behind
i will smile and i wont cry
coz...he's not mine

i really speachless
i cant understand for this situation
i know i am wrong to make one decision
i absolutely very blame inside my self
somebody needs to help my situation
somebody needs to help me
but
somebody that i wish could support me for this situation
just loose my hand
and let me pass this situation alone
i feel worse day by day
i feel no one care about me
i distrust to him
until i dont wanna need him anymore

i wanna life alone
i am happier to life by my self
than i must always use this fake face
i really hurt because of this
i finally realize
that love from him is not true love
it's only passion but cant touch my heart

now everything was happenned
i dont want let my self cry and regret for this
i wanna be healthy person again
i want to relieve my depression feeling by my self

please....i really need someone to help my stress
i need to continue my life
i want to pursue my dream
i want to release this heavy matter in my life
i wanna live freely in my life

tears please cure my hurt inside my heart
smile please fill my heart with happiness
for him...i know that you are not my everything
for him.. i want you go out of my mind
you like venom to me that will kill me step by step
you just attractive in surface but very deep hurt in my heart

i still want to life happily without you
i wanna life without you
i wanna loose you
i wish i didnt meet you again

thats the only way so i can be happy again...
bye bye dear
bye bye bebz

finally we cant be together
i am sorry that i erase all my memory with you
i erase all my love feeling for you
now..all is plain...
bye bye dear